Tuesday, July 25, 2017
Multiple Sclerosis (MS) and fatigue:
In
support of Multiple Sclerosis research:
Twitter
hashtags:
#MS
#MultipleSclerosis
#fums
#mseducation
#msawareness
#curems
#mymsme
#MSwarrior
#MSstrong
#fightms
#MSAwarenessMonth
#stumblingprincess
#OMS
#WalkMS
#WalkTogether
#WeAreStrongerThanMS
#mssucks
#movingmountainsforms
#lesion
#myelin
#demyelination
#disease
#brain
#vertigo
#cure
NEVER GIVE UP!
Friday, July 21, 2017
The Emotional Roller Coaster of Managing Emotions with MS:
July 18, 2017
by
In Columns, Patiently Awakened - A Column by
Teresa Wright-Johnson.
I am an
emotional, sensitive woman. I like to believe that I have a warm heart in a
very cold world. Isn’t this what the world needs? Love, warmth, acceptance and
transparency?
Recently
I find that my emotions change within a millisecond. So, instead of being
sensitive, I am “super sensitive.” I am easily offended, and I also can be the
one who offends another. I cry more often. These emotional highs and lows are
exhausting. If I had to describe it, my emotions are entangled, like spaghetti.
A millisecond is defined as one thousandth of a second. With this definition in
mind, it is safe to say that my description of my emotions may be a little
exaggerated, yet I want to ensure that I paint a clear picture.
I can
proceed from a state of happiness, to anger and even despair within moments. We
each have different temperaments and reactions. I am finding that my patience
at times can diminish quickly. This, of course, places me in a quandary, as I
am on a quest to transform into a peaceful, grateful, “patiently awakened”
individual.
I have
spoken to others who battle chronic illness. Changes in emotions seem to be a
common denominator among us. I sometimes feel as if I am on the verge of an
emotional breakdown. It’s as if my emotions lead me to the apex of intolerance,
yet there is something that prevents me from losing it completely. If you can
imagine this, or if you’ve been here, this is extremely difficult to admit –
and even more toilsome to discuss.
Healthline
published an article written by Jeri Burtchell and Ana Gotter titled “Understanding
and Managing Multiple Sclerosis Mood Swings.” In the overview the writers
described the same emotions I mentioned and often experience. “You may be happy
one minute and angry the next … these are examples of mood swings, which are
common in some people with multiple sclerosis (MS).”
The
article goes on to state that “mood swings are a common symptom of MS. But the
connection between the disease and emotions often goes unrecognized. It’s easy
to see many of the physical effects of MS, such as problems with balance,
walking or tremors. In comparison, the emotional impact of the disease is less
visible from the outside.”
The
article resonated with me for several reasons. First, it reiterated that I am
not alone in my struggle. Second, most of my symptoms at this point in my
disease are not really visible. I suffer from extreme fatigue, severe pain,
restlessness, anxiety and additional things that others cannot see. I have been
told I hide it well. Living with invisible illness is complex and vexatious. We
often are “betrayed and reduced” by the “you look fine” syndrome, which we know
fails to encompass and respect our entire situation. We are always fighting a
battle.
It is
ironic that our emotional outbursts and mood swings often are taken out on
those we love the most, or those who are the closest to us. They see what the
public cannot envision. They witness our emotional struggles in real time and
they, too, are affected. I am sometimes guilty of this behavior and after my
outbursts I experience remorse.
At
times I regret something that I may have said in anger and I feel powerless as
my reactions subjugate my reasoning. If you haven’t realized yet, I am having a
moment where I feel completely exposed. I often say there is power in
vulnerability, and someone needs to hear that they, too, are not alone.
Yes, I
am positive and optimistic most of the time and I sincerely appreciate my life. However, I am made of flesh and in my humanness lies imperfection, anxiety,
fear and, of course, strength. Having MS and chronic illness is a difficult
walk. I could have or would have never imagined this; nonetheless I am here,
and this is my reality. This roller coaster of emotions is a ride that I do not
enjoy. I have to sit with myself and ride this out. I can hope only that these
mood swings will quell and, with proper assistance, I will better manage my
emotions that come with the disease.
“Understanding
and Managing Multiple Sclerosis Mood Swings” discusses methods of managing and
coping with these myriad emotions. “The first step in taming your MS related
mood swings is speaking with your doctor.” They go on to suggest steps we can
take to help control our moods such as getting support from others and things
we can do on our own.
In
conclusion, most of us will experience mood swings and intense emotional
changes. Again, we are not alone. We have multiple resources and we have each
other. Please remember that we are worth fighting for.
“I am the face of a survivor, I am all of my pain and
glory.
Not always picture perfect, Yet I am alive to tell my
story.”
(— from
“A Survivor’s Anthem” © Teresa I. Wright-Johnson)
You are
invited to subscribe to my website at www.teresawrightjohnson.com
In
support of Multiple Sclerosis research:
Twitter
hashtags:
#MS
#MultipleSclerosis
#fums
#mseducation
#msawareness
#curems
#mymsme
#MSwarrior
#MSstrong
#fightms
#MSAwarenessMonth
#stumblingprincess
#OMS
#WalkMS
#WalkTogether
#WeAreStrongerThanMS
#mssucks
#movingmountainsforms
#lesion
#myelin
#demyelination
#disease
#brain
#vertigo
#cure
NEVER GIVE UP!
Wednesday, July 19, 2017
Room 237 & The Shining:
It’s Back. But What Does It Mean?
Aide to Kubrick on ‘Shining’ Scoffs at ‘Room
237’ Theories
27, 2013
Danny Lloyd in “The
Shining,” wearing an Apollo 11 sweater, which, says Leon Vitali, was not a reference
by his boss, Stanley Kubrick, to the faking of the moon landing.
Credit Warner Brothers.
Did you
watch the classic 1980 horror film “The Shining” and think it was about a man
driven to insane and murderous rage by a haunted hotel? If so, you blew it. Or
rather, you missed profound messages subtly embedded in the film by its
enigmatic director, Stanley Kubrick.
That,
at least, is the notion behind “Room 237,” a documentary by Rodney Ascher
released on Friday.
The
movie is a series of voice-overs atop scenes from Kubrick movies by a small
assortment of obsessives who have developed baroque theories about the true
meaning of “The Shining.” One believes the film is about the slaughter of
American Indians, another that it is about the Holocaust. Yet another claims it
is a kind of apology by Kubrick for the putative role he played in helping to
fake the moon landing.
And there’s more.
The
documentary could be construed as a sly tribute to “The Shining” as measured by
the startling variety of fanciful postulations and close viewings it has
inspired. But the theories are presented with such a surprising lack of irony
that it seems as though “Room 237” — the name refers to the scariest suite in
the Kubrick movie’s snowbound Overlook Hotel — just might want its audience to
take them seriously.
That
makes the theories fair game for a sober assessment. And who better to provide
one than Leon Vitali, who is listed in the closing credits of “The Shining” as
personal assistant to the director? Mr. Vitali had an acting role in Kubrick’s
1975 movie “Barry Lyndon,” went to work for him soon after and remained on his
payroll for decades. Mr. Vitali’s first task as an assistant was to fly to the
United States to cast the role of Danny, the child of Jack (Jack Nicholson) and
Wendy Torrance (Shelley Duvall). He was present during the 13-month filming at
sound stages near London, and throughout post-production.
Mr.
Vitali is a Briton who now lives in Los Angeles, where he works on his own and
other film projects. He was recently sent an advance copy of “Room 237,” and
not surprisingly it elicited a strong response.
A poster for the
documentary “Room 237,” in which the moon-landing reference is proposed.
“I was
falling about laughing most of the time,” he said by telephone. “There are
ideas espoused in the movie that I know to be total balderdash.”
Take,
for instance, the scene near the end of “The Shining” in which Jack Torrance is
about to chop down a door as he chases his wife and child with an ax. The
character recites a few lines of the “Three Little Pigs” story. “Little pigs,
little pigs, let me come in,” Jack huffs, mugging and grinning in pure
derangement. “Not by the hair on your chinny chin chin.”
In
“Room 237,” Geoffrey Cocks, a professor of history at Albion College in
Michigan and author of “The Wolf at the Door: Stanley Kubrick, History, and the
Holocaust,” writes that Disney’s original animated version of “Three Little
Pigs” featured an anti-Semitic caricature, a wolf dressed as a Jewish peddler.
He ties that in with several supposed references to the Holocaust to suggest
that Kubrick wanted to link the fictional horror in “The Shining” with the
real-world horror of the Nazi concentration camps.
That
reading implies that Kubrick planned
to use “Three Little Pigs.” But according to Mr. Vitali, when the scene was
being filmed Kubrick brainstormed with him and Mr. Nicholson what Jack Torrance
ought to howl before swinging his ax.
“Stanley
thought the scene needed something, a few lines for Jack that would make him
sound threatening and nasty,” Mr. Vitali recalled, but lines that could, in
another context, sound soothing. “Three Little Pigs” was proposed, but nobody
was quite sure about the words. So Kubrick called the mother of Danny Lloyd,
the child actor who’d won the role of Danny Torrance.
Leon Vitali
Credit Stephen Shugerman/Getty Images.
“She
was staying in an apartment nearby and she had the words to ‘Three Little Pigs’
right there,” Mr. Vitali said.
Mr. Vitali
also cautioned against the suggestion that there might be Holocaust overtones
to the German-made Adler typewriter that Jack uses to tap out his mad loop of
“All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.”
“That was
Stanley’s typewriter,” he said. “A lot of decisions made on the set were about
pragmatism: ‘This looks good. It sits on the oak table pretty perfectly.’ Not
to mention, it’s a great typewriter. I used that typewriter for 10 years,
actually.”
Kubrick,
who died in 1999, was legendary for his perfectionism, but he also believed in
improvisation. What looks to many of the Shinologists in “Room 237” like the
result of careful planning is often mere happenstance.
There
are scenes, for instance, in which Danny wears a sweater showing the Apollo 11
rocket. This becomes part of the faked-moon-landing theory, as articulated by
Jay Weidner, an author and independent filmmaker.
Jack Nicholson in
"The Shining."
Credit Warner Brothers.
“That
was knitted by a friend of Milena Canonero,” the costume designer, Mr. Vitali
said. “Stanley wanted something that looked handmade, and Milena arrived on the
set one day and said, ‘How about this?’ It was just the sort of thing that a
kid that age would have liked.”
Likewise,
the cans of Calumet baking powder seen in the Overlook pantry were chosen not
because they featured an American Indian in headdress, thus highlighting
Kubrick’s interest in the plight of the American Indian, but because they had
bright, bold colors.
“Part
of what I did during that trip to the U.S. in 1975 was shoot larders in
hotels,” said Mr. Vitali, using the British word for pantries. “It was so that
Stanley” — who was American born but had lived in England for years by then —
“knew what one was likely to see there. And I found Calumet cans all over the
place.”
Yet
another contention is that a poster in the Overlook shows a Minotaur,
suggesting that the movie is a retelling of the Greek myth about the part man,
part bull.
“That
astonished me,” Mr. Vitali said. “I stood staring at all that stuff for weeks
while we were shooting in that room. It’s a downhill skier. It’s a downhill skier.
It’s not a Minotaur.”
Mr.
Vitali said he never spoke with Kubrick about any larger meaning in “The
Shining.” “He didn’t tell an audience what to think or how to think,” he said,
“and if everyone came out thinking something differently that was fine with
him. That said, I’m certain that he wouldn’t have wanted to listen to about 70,
or maybe 80 percent” of “Room 237.”
Why
not?
“Because
it’s pure gibberish.”
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