There’s a syndrome that can develop in abusive, manipulative relationships that prompts a victim to stay even when they've often thought about leaving. I call it the Slot Machine Syndrome. Anyone who's played one of those "one-armed bandits" knows that it's difficult to stop pulling the lever even when you're losing pretty badly. There are primarily four reasons why a person can get trapped in this syndrome. First, there's the appeal of the "jackpot." People often jump at the chance to get a lot of something that's very valuable to them for what initially appears a relatively small investment. Second, whether or not you will get anything for your efforts depends only on the degree to which you are willing to "respond" (behaviorists call this a ratio schedule of reinforcement). With a slot machine, you have to do a lot of "responding" (investing) to even have a chance at winning. Third, every now and then, a "cherry" (or some similar small jackpot) appears and you "win" a little something. This reinforces the idea that your investment is not for naught and that "winning" a larger payoff is really possible if you just keep investing. Fourth, after you've been worn down by the machine's "abuse" and are tempted to walk away, you're faced with a most difficult dilemma. If you leave, you leave behind a substantial investment. You not only have to walk away from your "abuser," but from a huge chunk of yourself. To disengage with nothing to show for your time and energy but a broken spirit is hard to do. You're tempted to delude yourself by saying: "If I just put in one more quarter..."
Dr. George Simon is the author of:
In Sheep’s Clothing: Understanding and Dealing with Manipulative People.
&
Character Disturbance: The Phenomenon of Our Age.
In
support of Narcissistic Abuse awareness and recovery:
June 1st is World Narcissistic Abuse Awareness Day (WNAAD).
Recommended websites for research and recovery:
http://www.wnaad.com/
http://flyingmonkeysdenied.com/
http://www.innerintegration.com/
http://www.drgeorgesimon.com/
https://kimsaeed.com/
https://www.psychopathfree.com/
https://eclecticalu.blogspot.com/
http://www.doctor-ramani.com/
https://micheleleenieves.com/
https://www.thriveafterabuse.com/
Twitter hashtags:
#AbuseByProxy #Adultery #AgainstBullying #BackStabbers #ClusterB #CPTSD #Enablers #FlirtingIsCheating #FlyingMonkeys #Gaslighting #HealingFromCPTSD #IAmEnough #IAmStillStanding #IfMyWoundsWereVisible #Infidelity #MicroAggression #NarcissisticAbuse #Narcissism #Narcissist #NarcissisticPersonalityDisorder #NarcissisticSupply #Psychopath #PsychopathFree #SmearCampaign #Sociopath #ThrivingAfterNarcissisticAbuse #TwoFaced #WNAAD
June 1st is World Narcissistic Abuse Awareness Day (WNAAD).
Recommended websites for research and recovery:
http://www.wnaad.com/
http://flyingmonkeysdenied.com/
http://www.innerintegration.com/
http://www.drgeorgesimon.com/
https://kimsaeed.com/
https://www.psychopathfree.com/
https://eclecticalu.blogspot.com/
http://www.doctor-ramani.com/
https://micheleleenieves.com/
https://www.thriveafterabuse.com/
Twitter hashtags:
#AbuseByProxy #Adultery #AgainstBullying #BackStabbers #ClusterB #CPTSD #Enablers #FlirtingIsCheating #FlyingMonkeys #Gaslighting #HealingFromCPTSD #IAmEnough #IAmStillStanding #IfMyWoundsWereVisible #Infidelity #MicroAggression #NarcissisticAbuse #Narcissism #Narcissist #NarcissisticPersonalityDisorder #NarcissisticSupply #Psychopath #PsychopathFree #SmearCampaign #Sociopath #ThrivingAfterNarcissisticAbuse #TwoFaced #WNAAD
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